A Little Bit About Grieving


My Nan passed away 2 days ago, Saturday 24th 2016 at 3:15.

Sounds official, sounds final.

At this current time with tears in my eyes i write with heartache and pain. Grief can be overwhelming but we must not forget that life is for living. Its to be cherished, all to often we take things for granted. Like frustration or impatience, intolerance and differences of opinion.

When it all boils down to it, we will all be in the same situation. A coffin.

Now, i dont actually know or claim to know what happens after we die. As frustrating as it is i have been grasping at straws trying to find answers which do not come at all.

My dreams are nothingness, my soul screams for it, my heart yearns for it and nothing comes. One thing for certain is that life is fragile, she was fine Friday and Saturday morning issues happened and the sad day when she gave up her fight.

I only write because i dont actually know what to do, im lost.

But i have a loving family who support each other and love. I feel my nan around me everywhere and i just hope there is an afterlife and we will be reunited with her and my grand dad.

For now, i dont know what else to say. Even writing this has tortured my soul and turned me into a sobbing mess.

Sleep tight nan.

Peace and Love!

Controversial Racial Post!


OK I’ve had it with them, warts and all. I’m sick of the flipping looting, pillaging, gangs of gits who promote violence, I’m sick of the murders and the cannabilastic traits they’ve been known for since men arrived on here.

I’m sick of the whole “race card” when they lunge at me or push me hard. I’m tired of their hatred for us and getting agitated because we attack them.

Who else are sick of these flipping goblins? Green slimy feckers.

A Goblin Called Gloop


Gloop was not your everyday goblin, his bulbous nose stood out like an orange on his face with glooping snot hanging from it pretty much always. Hence his name, Gloop! you dummy!


His little black beady eyes sat atop the massive nose and blinked every few seconds, little yellow pupils in the centre. These little eyes could see both day and night which makes it confusing for our little goblin to sleep.


Now, his hair was tufty, in fact so tufty it was that he could make his very own clothes out of it. He often farted due to his diet and his over excessive drinking.


He is a very selfish creature, his massive bulging belly shows that he is a greedy little fellow.


His fat little sausage fingers were always dirty and never out of his mouth biting his fingernails, and his teeth were bent and missing in parts.


His favourite food is worm sandwiches with a lovely glass of slug juice, but if he could find some lovely bird poo. Delicious!

Now our tale begins when our very nosy hero stumbled upon an old wizard near his smelly cave.


Gloop was hunting some rotten rats when he stumbled over a log, he cursed his luck as he bounced a few times of the ground. His round stomach was very jiggly fellow readers!


Just as he was about to get up, his head tilted from side to side in a confusing way. His eyes crisscrossed and a questioning look appeared, what he saw there through the trees was a…a…thing. He didn’t know what it was.


He had never encountered a human before but he started laughing and rolling around. It was the funniest thing he had ever seen, skinny little creature with a beard and a hat.


He laughed so hard that he farted.

The fart being so loud that the human looked his direction.


“Uh-oh!” Gloop said in the normal dozy goblin way, he scuttled off away from this thing. The old thing was chasing him now and it seemed to be throwing hot things at him. One hit him in the bottom and he howled and howled, he started hopping as he ran.

“flipping eejit!” The wizard muttered under his breath. The wizard had his hands behind his back now as if inspecting the scene.


The wizard stopped and watched this extremely stupid goblin rolling around, hopping, standing up, somersaulting and rolling in the air.


“Still…an energetic flipping eejit” the wizard said, one hand came from behind his back and he threw a flash of magic at Gloop. Gloop was stuck in the air, frozen in time, his eyes able to move but nothing else.


“Ah Goblin!” the wizard exclaimed, Gloop farted in surprise, he was terrified.

The wizard laughed, he continued “Allow me to introduce myself”. The wizard bowed gracefully, his purple robes flowing as he bowed. “I am the great Greandath of the Pearl Jaguar In The Southland Of The Great Plains Of The Other Side Of A…” Gloops eyes went into spasm “Me..Greandath!” he pointed to himself getting the gist of Gloops brain power.


He flashed his hand at Gloop and instantly he was released from his frozen state, he bounced a few times and then stood up. Gloop shook himself like a dog and brushed off debris from his goblin clothes.


Gloop looked up at the wizard “you Gr..es.” he tried very hard to say the name, his eyes went crazy with using his brain which was the size of a pea. He strained hard to use it but ended up farting loudly, the wizard guffawed and slapped his hands on his robes.  This made Gloop angry. His fists clenched and he focused again “you, Gr..ea..n..dath!”


Greandath stopped guffawing “Bravo old chap! well done!” he approached the goblin and poked him hard into the chest. “And you?”


Gloop scratched his head.

The wizard repeated the poke on the chest, Gloop responded with a reactive punch in the chest which sent the wizard 5 or 6 feet into some hedges.


The wizard recovered heaving from the blow “strong blighter too” he wheezed. Greandath had leaves sticking out everywhere from his beard and his posterior. He was not angry, just amused by this creature.


“This will not do” he muttered, he approached the goblin again who was still scratching his head like nothing had happened. The wizard could have easily struck out and killed him but he decided that this goblin could be an interesting development in his plans.


He pulled off his plumpy hat and put his gangly arm down it, his tongue out to the side of his mouth, he concentrated on what he needed. He pulled out several items like a lettuce to which Gloop winced, he didn’t like ground food as he called it, the lettuce bounced on his head.


Then a kettle was brought out of the hat “No no no, I must find it…it just won’t do” the wizard launched half his body into the hat and Gloop could hear jingling and jangling, crashes and bangs. “Ah-ha! Found it!”.


Greandath pulled himself out and he was brandishing a potion, bright green colour and looked slimy. Gloop licked his lips, he thought it was slug juice, his grubby hands were reaching and his nose was dripping with snot.


He couldn’t control his greed, the wizard unpopped the vial but he needn’t have bothered as stupid Gloop bit into the vial and started eating and drinking, glass and liquid whole.


Greandath screamed in horror “you’ll kill yerself you buffoon!” he slapped his hand against his face. Gloop enjoyed it, he really did, he was getting a sore throat and he could not understand why! His face contorted as the liquid settled into his third stomach, his eyes went crisscrossed again and he farted but this time green fumes came flying out.


He fell to the ground in agony.

The last thing he saw was the wizards confused face.

Curse of the Village -Part 10 – The Cursed Witch


Rory woke up after a few hours sleep, he felt rested and a bit more relaxed.  He awoke to a beautiful woman on his chest, she was smaller than he.

Her jet black hair looked sleek and shined against the white room, one long streak of white ran through the satin like hair.  She was beyond beautiful, she was exquisite.  Her Brown eyes glistened in the light.

“You’re finally awake!” She exclaimed, the witch had a happy tone “my saviour!”

Rory took a while to think, this small woman he now has in his palm looked so fragile.  He let out a yawn.

“I want to see Conarght! I want to see the trickster!” She screamed, her tone changed from happy to anger.

“Why should I take you to him? You are no match for him in your current form” Rory batted back, the witch contorted with rage.  She started chanting and rubbing her hands in a magic trance.

Sparks flew but nothing happened.

She tried again to no avail.

“What have you done??” She screamed, she fell on Rory’s hand and started biting and scratching. Rory grimaced, her biting and scratching was akin to a bee sting.  Her words were venomous, she cursed at him.  He was about to throw her when he came to his senses.

He put her on the ground.

She sat there for what seemed to be years, sobbing and crying about her lost magic.

“Marghartha, we must go. Do you want to leave?” He said tenderly “Margyle is waiting for us.”

With the mention of Margyle her ears pricked up and her tears did stop.

“Margyle? Is he still alive? I thought he’d have perished years ago!” She looked away deep in thought “must have been a true transformation, thought his mortality would have died.”

She stopped talking to herself out loud and turned to Rory.

“Very well giant” she looked up, how the tables had indeed turned “take me to Margyle, I want to know what he wants.”

“I can tell you already” Rory replied, Marghartha eagerly awaited him to go on. “He wants to give you that which he has not got…freedom.”

A single tear went down the witches left eye.  She started to think she had made a mistake letting that man go, he truly had loved her.

She shook off the thoughts and retrieved her cold hard exterior. From an instant was a sad expression to a hardened cold grimace.

“Very well, take me there!”

Rory took her and put her on his shoulder, Rory didn’t see but she wept silently.  He walked out the portal, it instantly closed behind him and he went to the guardian.

He asked the guardian to open a portal to the bottom of the Hawthorne tree nearest Margyles cove.  A portal appeared and the Guardian winked.

“Just a moment! Before you go!” The Guardian yelled.

Rory stopped in his tracks, he wondered what possibly could the guardian want.

“Well, my greatest wish was to see Danu.  You made it happen and I would like to offer you a free portal to your heart’s desire.” The Guardian shook his nose and started to sniff.

“Ah, yes! The purpose of this adventure.  Where it all started , yes!” He kept sniffing “Rory, bring me your metal box.”

Rory brought his compass to the guardian, the guardian concentrated and sparks flew from his whole face and into the compass.  The guardian looked happy and content.

“All you have to do now is hold it in your palm outright, think of your portal.  It will be there, put your compass down to keep it open and pick it up to close.”

The Guardian was falling asleep “thank you for making my…wish…come…true” and he was asleep, snoring.

The witch tutted and rolled her eyes.

“Lazy git that one.” She retorted.

So they went through the newly created portal and arrived at the area where Rory had rowed across.  Rory saw that the leaf was still there where he had docked it.

He started to row the boat and heard the familiar scraping of a sword on stone, it was coming from the tree.  Looking up Rory saw the one eye of Magnus Barefoot looking around frantically.

Rory looked forwards shaking off the shivering anxiety. He pushed forward the dry leaf and started to paddle.  The leaf took forever to sail but they got to the other side after two hours.

Marghartha sat on the dry ground with a sad expression. “What is my purpose now Rory?” The first time Rory had heard any sadness from her “My magic was my birthright, it was my innate ability to survive, create and destroy.”

Rory sat beside the tiny figure, he felt sorry for her.  He tried to comfort her, he picked her up gently. He had to tread carefully with her feelings, he looked away in thought.

“Perhaps, if you had of used your magic for good…you might not be in this predicament.” Rory was matter of fact in his reply, not accusing.

The witch sadly shook her head.

“You know nothing of me, my history and what I had to go through. My family life was turbulent to say the least.  But no more on it.” The small witch stood up “I’m going to try my best to get my magic back, Rory if only you understood.  I’ve lost a part of my soul.  I need it back.” She looked deep into Rory’s eyes “I need to find Conarght of the Gold!”

Rory put her on his shoulder.

“From what I hear bed a trickster and an imp, tell me about him” Rory retorted trying to help her feel better.

“Ah we fought for 100 years or so, he’s a leprechaun.” She stopped as Rory had a smile appear “what? You don’t believe me?  You’ll believe in lazy wall guardians but not leprechauns.” He face was dismayed.  Rory stopped smiling and she carried on.

“He appeared to me when some men tried to execute me for being a witch, I was however in the middle of ridding the world of an evil woman.  A woman who had killed my lover, her husband. It’s not right but it’s the way love works.  She poisoned him and she had to pay.

The leprechaun appeared and granted me three wishes, I used them unwisely.  The last one I wished to live forever, a wish I’d come to regret.  I did live forever but my body aged old like the one in that white room.

I searched for potions, lotions and spells to make me younger.  I found the sap of the Hawthorne tree mixed with other ingredients can help you grow younger overnight.  So I needed the samples and the trickster found me trying it, he would not allow it.

A week or two later I went to the tree, he was there and we ended up in a magic fight.  Next thing I remember was being in that white room and the devil walking out.” She finished with a sigh.

“Don’t forget what you did to me!” Came a loud booming voice behind rory.  It was Margyle.

Marghartha was terrified.  He picked Rory up gently but only to see the tiny witch close.

“My love I have missed you” Margyle had wet eyes. Marghatha scoffed to which he shook his head. “I feel as though you have not changed”  he sadly shook his head.

He clicked his fingers and produced a very tiny potion, smaller than a grain of sand.  He put it on his other hand holding Rory.  Rory bent down and took it, he gave it to the witch.

“That will reverse the height, I wish you luck.”  With that he walked slowly away.  “Find your own way out.”

“Margyle! Wait!” She hopped up and down, waving her arms.  She gave up as soon as he left the light of his cove.  Rory bent his head solemly.  Poor guy he thought, still hoping for her.

The witch looked at the potion and then at Rory.

“Only one potion…” she grabbed it and gulped the liquid down.  She smirked after at Rory.

Suddenly she was growing and growing her normal stature looked like a giant to Rory.

Her fingers curled as she rose and Rory heard her groan.  As the transformation finished she looked down and snarled.  Her face full of hatred, her foot came down nearly crushing Rory.

“You lost me my magic!” She roared like a lioness.

Rory took cover and hid.

“I’ll find you Rory! And you’ll be sorry!” She wailed.

Rory had an idea but he needed to be quick.